As a gay man, I celebrated the Supreme Court’s decision last week to allow same-sex marriages throughout the United States so that gay couples can indeed be joined in holy matrimony. The ruling caused me to remember my own journey from a very confused husband who loved his wife but was torn by his attraction to men. Having been raised a Southern Baptist, I was conflicted but determined to live by the morality rules I had had ingrained in me. During my struggle, I rewrote the words to the hymn, “Just As I Am,” that I had sung in church for years and years. If you don’t know the hymn, then these words will not mean much to you. Here is the revised version of that hymn that I wrote as I was dealing with accepting myself as a gay Christian:
Just as you are, I cannot be,
Though I too am without one plea,
For God’s Son shed His blood for me.
O Lamb of God, I come.
Just as you are, I tried to be,
I thought my “dark blot” unsightly;
Yet Jesus said He died for me.
O Lamb of God, I come.
Just as I am, I now must be,
For I know Jesus died for me;
No separate eternity.
O Lamb of God, I come.
