Imitation is Suicide

I never thought I would be proud to be gay. When I came out to my roommate years ago, he said, “One of these days you will celebrate your gayness.” I didn’t believe him … and it has indeed been a long, tedious journey. First of all, I had to get over all of my sexual hang-ups, mainly that sex was a sin and dirty. That didn’t happen until I met my Dutch lover when sex and intimacy felt good and natural, and I first experienced actually being in love. I couldn’t believe what I had missed as a homosexual trying to be a heterosexual. Having intimate sex was everything it had been cracked up to be and was not the Hollywood myth I had thought it to be. However, while sex out of the context of a relationship can be exciting and thrilling, only within a committed relationship can it reach Biblical proportions. To find myself in such a good relationship with myself is the most important thing that could ever have happened. “Love thy neighbor as thyself” finally came to mean more to me than it ever had before. Unless someone can love himself, he cannot possibly love his neighbor. Today, I am me, a gay man who isn’t afraid of his gayness and isn’t afraid that others will learn of it. It is the me who was under siege for so much of my life, mainly because I was trying to live the life I thought others required that I live. Ralph Waldo Emerson said, “Imitation is suicide.” Truly it is. Thank God, I survived.

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About bobosbest

I am a 79-year-old retired English teacher whose writing goals are fulfilled by publishing these blogs. I have a wonderful married partner, Dimitris Tsitsiras, who is from Greece. Life is good and still an adventure.
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One Response to Imitation is Suicide

  1. Priscilla says:

    Tommy – if “imitation is suicide” and your blog represents being the “true you” – then your life story is an illustration of “originality is Life-giving”.

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